so what if I'm not like other people?
so what if I don't have privileges like other people?
so what if I don't get to do what other people are able to do?
so what??
I've done things...not much..but I've done things. I should be contented with that. Take whatever life offers me. Do not just ask for more, WORK for more. Don't complain, don't get stressed out because of it, just do what I have to do.
I'll be 20-ly aged (HAHA) in a few days. I seriously need to reflect back on the things I've done, haven't done and even the things I've done halfway. All the anger inside me, all the needs, all the wants, all the unsatisfaction...all these I need to review all over again; the causes, the implications, the root of all these feelings...
Having said that, I realize I've so many to improve about myself. My behaviour, my way of thinking and my way of feeling....should be enhanced to better suit me as a grown up person. It might help me be a better human being, and thus be a better student,daughter,sister,friend, etc.
I picked up a lot of valuable lessons in my short life. Some were harsh but useful and self-constructing, some were nice but short-lived, some were pleasant and much needed...all these shaped me into what I am now. If I can change some of it, I would...but as human, I believe, even then, I would still be unsatisfied with what I had, so what's the point?
I regreted some of my choices in the past, regreted unnecessary mistakes I've done, regreted taking things for granted..but so what? I've lived past it, I've succeed in my own ways, and I'm still a good enough person...Regret is regret;asked for forgiveness when I hurt somebody, did not repeat the same mistake, and learned the lessons behind it was what I did. And then, I moved on; although sometimes it took time to move on but I MOVED ON.
So I'm going to be 20. So I'm going to change.
I'm freaking bored...!!! I can write a book full of crap like the above text and bore people..
But...so what?? wagaggagga..crazieee...aku...crazieeeee.....
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